We don’t have to chase joy, nor do we need to wait for a big achievement or life milestone. Joy is something we can cultivate every single day through authenticity and intention. After surviving and healing from narcissistic abuse, discovering happiness on your own terms isn’t just liberating—it’s a profound act of self-love. Let’s explore how you can intentionally create moments of joy that align with your values and bring lasting satisfaction.

1. Redefine Happiness for Yourself

True joy comes when you define it on your own terms, free from societal expectations or the influence of others. Growing up or being in relationships with narcissistic individuals often means you were conditioned to prioritize someone else’s version of happiness. Now is the time to ask yourself:

• What does happiness feel like for me?

• What activities, people, or places genuinely bring me peace and fulfillment?

• How can I create joy in ways that align with my authentic self?

When you stop looking outward for happiness and start building it from within, your life begins to reflect the empowered woman you are becoming.

2. Embrace the Power of Small Joys

Happiness doesn’t have to be a grand event—it lives in the quiet, everyday moments. Notice the beauty in a morning cup of coffee, the warmth of the sun on your face, or the satisfaction of crossing an item off your to-do list.

Try this practice:

Write down three small things that brought you joy at the end of each day. Over time, this practice will train your brain to notice and savor joyful moments more frequently.

3. Live Intentionally

When you approach each day with intention, you give yourself the power to shape your experience. Begin your morning by setting a positive intention, such as:

• “Today, I will embrace gratitude.”

• “I will find one moment to rest and recharge.”

• “I will honor my boundaries with love and confidence.”

Living intentionally helps you stay aligned with your values and makes joy a natural part of your routine.

4. Prioritize Playfulness and Fun

As adults, we often forget the importance of play. Yet, playfulness brings lightness and creativity into our lives. Whether it’s dancing to your favorite song, trying a new hobby, or laughing with a friend, joy thrives in moments of spontaneity and fun.

Ask yourself:

• When was the last time I did something just for fun?

• How can I incorporate more playfulness into my week?

Let go of perfectionism and give yourself permission to enjoy life fully and freely.

5. Connect with Your Inner Self

Joy is a natural outcome of self-connection. Take time to tune into your emotions, values, and desires through practices like journaling, meditation, or mindful movement. By nurturing your relationship with yourself, you create a solid foundation for happiness that no external factor can shake.

6. Celebrate Your Wins—Big and Small

Every step forward on your journey is worth celebrating. Acknowledge your progress, whether it’s setting a boundary, taking time for self-care, or simply showing up for yourself.

Create a “Joy Jar”: Write down moments of pride or happiness on small pieces of paper and collect them in a jar. On difficult days, revisit these notes to remind yourself of your growth and strength.

7. Surround Yourself with Positivity

The people, environments, and content you consume influence your emotional well-being. Curate a life that uplifts and empowers you:

• Spend time with those who honor your boundaries and encourage your growth.

• Declutter your space to create a peaceful sanctuary.

• Fill your mind with positive, inspiring media and limit exposure to negativity.

8. Release the Pressure to “Be Happy” All the Time

Happiness is a journey, not a constant state. Life will have its ups and downs, and that’s okay. Embrace the full range of your emotions, knowing that joy can still be found, even in small pockets, during challenging times.

9. Give Yourself Permission to Rest

Rest is a radical act of self-care in a world that values productivity over peace. Allow yourself the time to recharge without guilt. Rest creates space for creativity, clarity, and, ultimately, joy.

10. Practice Gratitude Daily

Gratitude is one of the simplest yet most transformative practices for cultivating joy. When you focus on what you’re thankful for, you shift your mindset from lack to abundance.

Start with this prompt:

• “Today, I am grateful for…”

Write down three things each day, no matter how small. Over time, this practice rewires your brain to seek out positivity and joy naturally.

Living Joyfully on Your Terms

Joy doesn’t come from meeting someone else’s expectations—it comes from living authentically, intentionally, and unapologetically as the sovereign woman you are. By embracing small moments of happiness, celebrating your wins, and staying connected to your inner self, you create a rich and fulfilling life.

You deserve a life filled with joy—not because of what you achieve or how others perceive you, but because of who you are.

With love and joy,
Jillian